Hardware
& software:
all our awnings are built on welded aluminum frames. Our custom fitted
canvas covers are woven to 18th Century British Navy specifications.
Tiny elves who sleep under the eaves thoroughly wash
and re-waterproof the fabric every evening. During hurricanes, the
elves remove the canvas and lash it to the aluminum yardarms.
We
start
with 3/4" aluminum stock, hand drawn by skilled
Egyptian extruders who work entirely in the nude.
Using
heliarc
technology developed for the Luftwaffe and stolen by
All-American Industrial spies, we stick chunks of aluminum
together.
Sometimes
people look at our work. When we think they might, we
quickly grind all welds so they look like the various
aluminum elements grew that way.
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